ok i really need some amazing advice/insight. i finished college in 1999 with a 3.1 gpa in biochem (worked full time all through school) i was headed to dental school, but after a breast cancer scare, i took 3 years off and am certain that med is the only thing im passionate about. took the mcat and didnt do the best (under 30) but i did get into a master/leading to med program.
some background info, i have 9 years hospital work under my belt, 5 years research with publications, and am educational director for a breast cancer awareness organization. oh, and i turn 25 this saturday.
so i was in this master’s program since july 2002, and was getting A’s and B’s, loved what i was studying-(embryo/physio/biochem-the first year of med basically) and then things started getting really horrid in my personal life during my second quarter. i became extremely depressed (did not eat/sleep or get out of bed and this is continuing since december)the last straw came 2 weeks ago when my uncle passed away from an MI the day i had a final. i failed the final.
my degree depended on me passing that class, and my dean was unwavering and told me i would not receive my degree. so i withdrew.
the dean also told me that he does not see how i could get into med now with this last grade. he suggested i “really consider other options (i.e. a job) since med school is obviously not in your future”.
currently i am the poster child for severe clinical depression and do not know what to do or how to go on from here.
i am considering taking the mcat again in april 2003-to boost my score to over 30, which i think is very tangible. i am currently applying to med for fall 2003, but i have no interviews so far =probably not going to get in anywhere.
help!
and please dont suggest a PA or nursing school-(no offense guys, youre great) i know that all i want is an MD.
help!!!
| QUOTE (purgatory @ Feb 5 2003, 01:10 AM) |
| i finished college in 1999 with a 3.1 gpa in biochem (worked full time all through school) i was headed to dental school, but after a breast cancer scare, i took 3 years then things started getting really horrid in my personal life during my second quarter. i became extremely depressed the last straw came 2 weeks ago when my uncle passed away from an MI the day i had a final. i failed the final. my degree depended on me passing that class, and my dean was unwavering and told me i would not receive my degree. so i withdrew. the dean also told me that he does not see how i could get into med now with this last grade. he suggested i "really consider other options (i.e. a job |
Buckle down your hatches here, dear, because I'm going to be very frank with you.
I'm seeing quite a pattern here, purgatory. I see that you've taken on a series of responsibilities, then not lived up to them. You list some reasons for each scenario, yet the reasons you cite are really just the ups and downs of life. Many of us worked fulltime during undergrad, and many more were raising children. Instead of having an uncle pass away, you might have a parent pass away; instead of having a 'cancer scare', you might be diagnosed with cancer - both of which happened to me while I was a medical student. People get divorced, have sick children, face financial difficulties... Trials and tribulations are a part of life, and how we deal with them defines who we are and what we are capable of.
The responsibilities of medical training - and of being a physician - will eclipse those of your previous experiences. And there is much truth to the saying, 'the best predictor of the future is the past'. This is not to say that you cannot perform with the consistency and perserverence needed to train as a physician, but you haven't given evidence of it up to this point. To refuse to complete the coursework for one class after coming this far speaks volumes about your character - and the messages are that you lack integrity, maturity and sound judgment.
I think you have some work to accomplish before focusing all of your time and energies on a lifetime pursuit. Finish your Masters. Take steps to deal with your depression. Get some stability and constancy under your belt. Many of the people on this website didn't enter medical school until their thirties or even forties. You have time - both to prove yourself, and to make things better for yourself.
sorry, maybe i should've been more specific.
i didn't withdraw from the master's program by choice really. there is nothing i want more than to be in school. however, my program was dependant on getting over a 3.0 at all times. hence, having failed that final made it impossible for me to receive a degree. i can't afford the $53K/year tuition if im not going to get a degree. so i withdrew. i wish i could continue-i've written to admission counselors trying to get someone to advise me on where to go now, or what to do since i cannot continue at the school i was doing my master's at. how do i go about proving that i can handle med?
also, with the cancer scare, i had surgery for breast cancer at 21, right after graduating in fact. stage zero. luckily since i caught it on time, i didn't need chemo/radiation.
again, thanx for your reply- i do appreciate the frankness
HI Purgatory,
First let me say that I'm no expert on anything–but wanted to give you my opinion. Granted, it's hard to lend an opinion when all I know is very little–but nonetheless.
Being a counselor (masters in Psych)–I would naturally think that the first thing you really ought to consider doing is to TAKE CARE OF YOURSELF FIRST. If you are truly depressed and are struggling with difficult times, then that is the first thing to focus on. If you don't, your studies will suffer. Even if you were accepted to medical school and did nothing to address your depression, medical school will add to your problem. Perhaps counseling, or talking to your physician???
Once you feel you have addressed that issue, then maybe go back to the whole medical school issue. I have ALWAYS been a strong believer that although people make mistakes in the past for whatever reason, medical school is still a possibility. If this is your dream, than take care of yourself and go for it. Hope for the best and accept the worst if it comes. None of us really know if we will ever get in (I mean, we all HOPE and PRAY…but it is a reality that some of us won't get in). I know I'm a longshot for med school…a HUGE longshot…but I'm following through until the end and will cross the bridge of not getting in IF it comes…and not before then.
Whatever you do…chin up and best of luck to you.
Anna
Hello Purgatory.
#1. I think you should pick a less depressing screen name. 
#2. I cannot emphasize enough that you need to GO TO A DOCTOR NOW.
There is no reason that you need to go through this alone. A psychiatrist can evaluate you and tell you whether you would benefit from medication and/or therapy. If you do not have insurance, call your local community mental health center. Depression is a treatable medical condition, and not simply the result of failing to deal responsibly with “the ups and downs of life,” as GED2MD suggests (It’s funny how frankness and unhelpful self-righteousness can sometimes sound so similar…). It sounds like when you feel okay, you are able to achieve at a very high level–you have a great resume, a 3.1 in biochem is nothing to be ashamed of, you were accepted into a what sounds like a competitive master’s program, and you did well, until you became depressed. Stop being so hard on yourself (easier said than done, I know, but that’s where the nice drugs that the doctor gives you can really help out 
).
Once you are feeling better, then worry about med school. So this year might be a wash. Lots of us end up reapplying. The dean of your college sounds like a jerk (dear God, $53,000/YEAR??). Was he aware of the problems you’d been having? Discuss the situation with your doctor. He or she may be willing to write a letter to the dean on your behalf testifying that you had a medical condition (I mean the depression) that interfered with your studies. Some schools will then remove the grades from the bad semester from your transcript (although, it will still show up on AMCAS, but you can list it as an administrative withdrawl and it won’t affect your GPA.) Do you have any instructors in the program that could act as advocates for you? If the dean is immovable, you might even consider going above his head. You will have to come clean to the administration (and admissions committees when the time comes) re your mental health problems, but the alternative is that they just think you’re a flake, so there’s not much to lose. Even if this doesn’t work, med schools aren’t completely unforgiving. When talking to official people, always make it sound like you’re all better now, and that your experiences gave you the chance to develop coping skills that will only help you in your medical training. (A line from my PS–sounds good, right?)
So, once that’s resolved, come up with something really good to do for a year. Definitely talk to people at admissions at med schools. I promise this isn’t the end of the world. Things will get better. Good luck!
Sarah
| QUOTE (purgatory @ Feb 4 2003, 08:10 PM) |
|
so i was in this master's program since july 2002, and was getting A's and B's, loved what i was studying-(embryo/physio/biochem-the first year of med basically) and then things started getting really horrid in my personal life during my second quarter. i became extremely depressed (did not eat/sleep or get out of bed and this is continuing since december)the last straw came 2 weeks ago when my uncle passed away from an MI the day i had a final. i failed the final. my degree depended on me passing that class, and my dean was unwavering and told me i would not receive my degree. so i withdrew. the dean also told me that he does not see how i could get into med now with this last grade. he suggested i "really consider other options (i.e. a job) since med school is obviously not in your future". currently i am the poster child for severe clinical depression and do not know what to do or how to go on from here. i am considering taking the mcat again in april 2003-to boost my score to over 30, which i think is very tangible. i am currently applying to med for fall 2003, but i have no interviews so far =probably not going to get in anywhere. help! and please dont suggest a PA or nursing school-(no offense guys, youre great) i know that all i want is an MD. help!!! |
Hi there,
You have gotten some great advice and insight in the above posts but I am going to add a couple of things to the above. You were in a program that was essentially the equivalent of medical school and you were not able to handle the courseload for whatever reason. As dispassionate as this must seem, your Dean has done you a favor in telling you that medical school is probably not in your future. There are few, if any, medical schools in this country that are going to take a "chance" on a student who has proven that they cannot handle the curriculum.
You have invested a huge amount of money in post-graduate studies. I can tell you that medical school is not cheap and there is a very strong indication (by your past performance) that you are not going to be able to get through the curriculum if you start. You would end up with a couple of hundred thousand dollars in debt that you would have difficulty paying back unless you happen to win the Lotto. Even now, you are going to need a fairly good salary to pay back what you have already invested in a degree program that you are not going to finish.
Another thing that was mentioned above was that you have medical problems that you seem not to have addressed at this point. Most if not all, medical school Deans of Admission are going to tell you to get your medical problems well-controlled before you even think of applying to medical school.
Is there a role for you in the the medical profession? Yes, but probably not as an MD as you have been told by a Dean in a program that prepares non-traditional people for medical school. You may want to sit down and ask yourself what can you contribute to the medical profession with an MD and without an MD? What is it about being an MD(and feel free to substitute DO for the MD here too) that makes this an all-or-none proposition for you? Most things in life (99.99%) are not all-or-none so there must be a compromise career out there that does not require an MD/DO that you can love and will be fufilling and wonderful.
You were able to take your experience with breast cancer and turn this into a successful career in breast cancer awareness education. There are plenty of women who are diagnosed with breast cancer each day, that could really benefit from you wisdom and guidance. You might be able to do something here (that does not require an MD/DO) that you might find fufilling where you could make a real difference in the lives of people who are in need of this vital service. Before you dismiss nursing and becoming a physician assistant, you might want to re-visit the options that each of these careers have to offer and see if you can't find a compromise that would satisfy your career needs and provide a good income for you.
If you snake back through some of the very early posts on one of these threads, you will read the story of a PA who decided to not pursue medical school any longer because it was too difficult on his wife. She had been carrying the brunt of his pursuit of medicine and he realized that medical school was not worth putting his wife and their relationship though more distress. She had been supportive and very willing to keep going but he said that he loved her too much to keep up this relentless pursuit where she was the principle income. He has been a very successful cardio-thoracic physician's assistant and continues in that role today with much satisfaction. While he dreamed of earning an MD and no-doubt would have succeeded, he made a decision to compromise on his dream so that he could be with his wife and family because they needed him most.
I know that it was very difficult for you to hear what your Dean had to say. It is very difficult to hear that you have failed in achieving what you want but be very careful not to ignore what may be good advice because it is not what you wanted to hear. Take some time and look into alternatives to MD/DO that you might find fufilling.