High school drop out to surgeon...

  • BigBill Said:
I guess when I look back I get upset that since I started taking classes I could have been in now, yet I realize god may have a different plan. �I mean the last people you would have to fight should be your family. Yet no family is perfect and this experience may help down the road.

�Its just I didnt evision being this old and thinking about getting in by the time Im forty. �My plans were to get in and be in residency by the time I was forty. Its frustrating to schedule an MCAT and pay for it then plead with your father to come another time and he act like I was crazy. �then when he comes in he tells you to quit and be a teacher. Or your mother tells you that your to old when she was fifty when she tried to get in then celebrate when you tell her your thinking of a PHD. �

�I know Im venting yet it is frustrating. �I hope no one has to go through that.

�anyway thanx for the peptalk.



I have learned that at times, it is appropriate to ignore family. I have a background story as well (mostly DV victim, loaded gun at my face...stalker...etc) and when I first announced to my family that I wanted to go to medical school, they scoffed at me. I was just transferring from CC to the Uni. To quote my mother, "Are you sure that is even a possiblilty for you?" My first response was to be very upset. I did not mention it again until I was applying. Oh the lectures I got about "getting a masters degree" "being reasonable" "isn't it like getting noticed as an artist, due mostly to chance?". After 2 rounds of rejections I started to believe them, but decided to give it one more try.

Oh they were surprised to hear of my multiple acceptances!

Fortunately for me, I live 3000 miles away from them so I am in more control of their negativity. I just advise you to think about your decision, and if it is really what you want, don't let anyone tell you that you can't. Parents don't always know what is best for their child. Don't get me wrong, I am still friends with my family, and am moving closer to them for school. I just think their relatively uneducated background and living a life governed by fear and insecurity makes them the way they are. They are not bad people, just not perfect.

I think the experience made me stronger. I listen to myself, make decisions for myself, and forgive those who seek to hinder my efforts (as long as it is not malicious). Keep your head up and nose to the grindstone and you will succeed in whatever you want. Only YOU can say what is best for you.

I second everything misscompassion is saying…


BLessings

I will third it!!!

I guess I’m 4’thing it…


When I joined this site I was about to move my wife and I back to Florida to live with my mom as I went to school fulltime. Then reality hit that there was no confidence nor support from my mom that I would be a fulltime student much less a doctor. The arrangement fell apart before I turned in my letter of resignation.


My mom still sees me as the little boy who did x, y, & z. The past 16 years I’ve been away from home mean nothing and I couldn’t expose my wife nor myself to the constant bombardment of “Your lying to yourself…there are no such thing as OPM’s…you should be a nurse…I asked my doctor and he said…you never did homework before so why now…you need to landscape the yard instead of ‘pretending’ to be studying…you need to get a job because I don’t believe your lie that you’re going to school fulltime…” and on and on and on… Yes. I did hear those things and we hadn’t moved yet.


On one side the family believes I’m already a doctor and on the other they believe I’ll never be a doctor. So I have both extremes…funny thing…I lean toward the side that says I won’t be. That way, when I do become a doctor they don’t have to know and I don’t have to give medical advice that they won’t follow anyway.

I don’t think my family believes I will actually follow through with my plans. My mother believes I can do it, but having worked as a nurse for many years, I think she fears for my quality of life as a medical professional. My father is pretty skeptical about my goals, and I don’t blame him. He’s watched me crash & burn one too many “big ambitions” to be very impressed with the current one. My brother & sister both think I’m a little old to be switcing over to such an intense career, but are otherwise supportive. My wife’s family is Taiwanese and seem to have a strong positive bias towards the pursuit of any sort of higher education. Her brother, however, is a primary care physician who thinks I am insane for even taking pre-med classes at 40, let alone pursuing a medical career.


People have some pretty strong, sometimes strange, preconceptions about who may become a physician (including physicians and those seeking to become physicians). The ultimate determinant lies within the individual. Sure, there are some folks who are truly not capable of becoming a doctor (people with grave mental impairments, for instance). Capabilities aside, it seems to me that deep, personal motivation is the only relevant factor for success at anything. If you are capable (not an insignificant “if”) & you want it bad enough… what is there to stop you?


I can hear my dad now… “Stop yapping & put your money where your mouth is.”


Tim

  • T_Forsythe Said:
...The ultimate determinant lies within the individual...Capabilities aside, it seems to me that deep, personal motivation is the only relevant factor for success at anything. If you are capable (not an insignificant "if") & you want it bad enough... what is there to stop you?



You should memorize this & recite while looking at yourself in the mirror every morning to kick off the day!

I just came across this thread now and wanted to leave my 2 cents here for the next wanderer who ambles by -


After having read all the replies to the original post above, I realized that what I tell myself everyday pretty much summarizes everything above into a pithy little package. Every morning, or whenever you’re down, or tired, or thinking of throwing in the towel I just tell myself -


“I only have one life to live; how I live it today is my choice, my decision.”


In the words of Henley, “[sic]…I am the master of my fate, I am the captain of my soul”.

Well, I matriculated to the University of Kansas SOM in 2004 and was surprised to find that at 42, I was actually the FOURTH oldest student. BUT my story went something like “GEDtoMD’s” story with a little twist… ADHD.


The following article ran in 2004 in the Kansas City Star by reporter Joyce Smith


"A 42-year-old father of six and former truck driver who nearly flunked out of high school might not seem like medical school material.


Then you meet Richard Boyd.


The first-year medical student never gave up on his dream — and this fall earned one of 175 spots at the University of Kansas School of Medicine, where only one in seven applicants is accepted. “I always wanted to be a physician,” said Boyd. “For me, ‘doing for others’ is the high. Giving hope and comfort to other human beings goes beyond any price.”


Boyd isn’t the oldest medical student at the school, where the average age of first-year medical students is about 24. He will be almost 50 when he completes medical school, residency and internships.


Others his age are often looking toward retirement, but he’s just getting started.


Learning difficulties


Boyd said he would have worked to become a doctor 20 years ago if he hadn’t had such a difficult time graduating from high school in Midlothian, Va. His grades were so low he had to go to summer school two years in a row.


“In high school, three D’s and three F’s was a good report card. I was passing three subjects — what more could you ask?” said Boyd in his rapid-fire way of talking. “When I sat down to read, I had about 10 minutes of concentration before it was gone.”


Instead of going to college, he joined the Air Force, where he met his wife, Kathy.


“He was the man to go to for listening, getting things done. People in the barracks would say, ‘Let’s call Sparky,‘” said Kathy Boyd of their time in the service. Boyd got the nickname Sparky while serving as a volunteer firefighter in high school.


“You can see the intelligence just broiling underneath, but he couldn’t figure out how to get it out,” she said.


After leaving the service in 1985, Boyd was working as a heavy-equipment operator in Virginia when Kathy was diagnosed with adult asthma.


“I helplessly watched my beautiful wife waste away,” he said. “We didn’t have any insurance and she knew this was going to destroy us. She even tried to take her breathing tube out in the hospital so she could go home. I felt absolutely inadequate.”


Frustrated by his inability to help, he researched the disease and then took a six-week course to become an emergency medical technician. He excelled in the class.


“It was the first time I had done anything academic since high school, and there’s nothing like success,” he said.


Boyd began driving trucks for a living — and serving as a volunteer EMT. Three years later he became a firefighter/medic while lecturing on respiratory emergencies to paramedics. Kathy got better.


Eventually, Boyd decided to pursue a nursing degree. He completed a two-year program over four years at a community college. He found he could handle two or three subjects a semester — but had difficulty focusing on more than that.


Kansas bound


After visiting his grandmother in Sabetha, Kan., in 1993, Boyd decided to move his family to the small town in northeast Kansas. He went to work at Sabetha Community Hospital. As a nurse, Boyd said, he was often told that he couldn’t overstep his bounds, even when he knew more to do for a patient.


His desire to become a doctor was rekindled by a country doctor, John Yulich.


“The doctors would rotate calls on weekends, but he always took his own calls,” Boyd said. “He said, ‘If any of my patients need me, day or night, call me.’ Wow, is that commitment. He learned the life stories of the patients, met their families.


“I wanted to be a country doc, too, and provide for people who don’t have any other options — no access to health care, no insurance,” Boyd said.


At age 38, hoping to eventually become a doctor, Boyd went back to college in 2000 to pursue a bachelor of general studies in human biology from the University of Kansas in Lawrence.


He learned to study at the same time every day, alone, in the basement of one of the KU libraries, with no TV and no computer, and to use the same kind of notebooks — three-ring binders, same brand, same size.


“It had to be regimented. I had to eliminate as many variables as possible,” said Boyd, who didn’t know yet that he had attention deficit disorder.


He lived in student housing and went home to Sabetha every weekend. The schedule was nothing new to the Boyd family because as a trucker he was often away for three-week stretches.


“Every week when I went home it was pure quality time,” Boyd said. “I don’t do homework at home. My motivation is pure play. Remote-control cars, take Kathy out to supper or go dancing, camping, shop, or sit down to talk to the kids.”


Kathy Boyd also sent e-mail to her husband two or three times a day so he could help with parenting issues.


The first year was fine, Richard Boyd said, but he felt out of control in the second year as he tried to handle a full course load — physics with a lab, general chemistry with a lab, physiology with a lab, and trigonometry.


“I went from two or three things, which is what people with ADD can deal with at a time, to seven things,” Boyd said. “I went in for tutoring and found an ADD brochure. I had already developed by trial and error the fabulous study skills and discipline. I just needed the final component, the medication Ritalin.”


Within a year of taking medication, he was making nearly all A’s.


At first, Boyd sat by himself in most classes. But when the younger students got a look at his high grades, they began sitting by him, asking him to join their study groups. He also taught an undergraduate physiology lab at KU after his first year.


Boyd beams when he recalls that he was ranked second out of 500 students in organic chemistry — one of the most difficult classes, the gatekeeper to medical school.


Medical school


Despite his qualms about being too old or too stupid, Boyd started medical school at KU in Kansas City, Kan., in August.


“He was regarded very highly. He had a lot of good and relevant life experiences and was highly motivated,” said Sandra McCurdy, associate dean for admissions at the school.


Kathy Boyd, meanwhile, wasn’t surprised by his acceptance into the program.


“I said, ‘Wow! Yeah!’ I’ve always seen him as a doctor so I was just waiting. It just was a matter of time,” she said. “He’s very intelligent. He cares much more about people than things.”


Through a rural doctor program, Kansas pays his tuition and he gets a $1,500 stipend. In return, he must practice in rural Kansas for four years.


The Boyd’s paid off their house and cars with a small inheritance. In addition, Boyd’s sister and brother-in-law help pay the family’s utilities, as they did through his undergraduate work.


“Ever since he was a little boy I thought he should be a doctor,” said his sister, Linda Hayes, who lives in Richmond, Va. “He was like a little old man, always asking questions and inventing things. And he would always try to help.”


Every couple of weeks, Kathy and the children — Hope, 4; Nathan, 6; Ricky, 8; Becca, 13; Erin, 16; and Renee, 18 — drive to Kansas City, Kan., for a couple of days, crowding into Boyd’s studio apartment. They make soups and pies, clean, and do their father’s laundry.


Kathy Boyd schools the children at home and recently started working on her undergraduate degree at Highland Community College in Sabetha.


“I would probably shrivel up and die if we weren’t changing things and growing,” she said. “I’m the same way he is. We have always been a closely matched team; I’ve got to have something new to try. I don’t see myself settling down in my 90s.”


Neither does her husband.


Although Boyd is years behind the average medical school student, he plans to make up for that by never retiring. Boyd jokingly adds, “Kathy told me she will not have me messing up the kitchen in her golden years”.


“I’m going to take care of people, regardless,” Boyd said. “People say, ‘I’m too old, I can’t do that.’ That’s not true. They need to broaden their horizons a little bit.”



Wow, thanks for that Richard…and GED2MD…these were truly inspiring! Good luck with everything!

Hi Everyone! I’m new here, I just wanted to say that this story is awesome and sounds so much like my own except dad left. I always thought I could never go to med school, I’ve talked myself into pursuing other jobs and it’s been hard. I’m glad to hear other success stories!

that is a fantastic story, i am 44, a nurse’s aide, lots of icu and cardiac stepdown experience, will be completing an adn program to support my son during college, and then will being pre-med pre-reqs. someone please tell me that i am not crazy for pursuing this because it just “feels right”. it is the only thing that feels right, and i will be frustrated and full of regret if i do not at least give it a 100% shot…best wishes from the trenches

Trench, I’m 44.



OH MY GOD!!! How Awesome Dr. Boyd! I feel the same way…Not smart enough, my age…(33) the test to get in the test to get out…I have no college background. All these odds! Your story in amazing. im going to really try hard…and pray harder…Thank you for your amazing story. God bless you!

BigBill,


I’m not too familiar with your situation, and it probably isn’t my place to say anything at all, yet, I feel compelled to mention that I am 26 and I get told I’m too old to pursue this. Of course, that’s ridiculous. My point, however, is that people who want to talk us down will always find a reason somewhere.

What a beautiful post this is! It is such a privilege to read such heartwarming success stories and to be motivated to reach for the stars.


I’m going to print this and stick it on my wall!

Our life experience as nontrads is one of our greatest assets in this journey.


What fantastic stories. I love it when people beat the odds and prove naysayers wrong.


Just realized this is a 2 year old post, but hey!

Your story is absolutely inspirational and hopeful to many of us. I am wondering if you would disclose where you applied for medical school?


I found that the biggest response i receive when I tell even family and close friends about my goals is “You are too old for this”. And they have been telling me this since I was 25. I even worked along side some pre-medders in their 20’s when I was in liver research, and their response was, to say the least, discouraging. No person on this site has ever found an expiration date written on their dreams!

Well


here is my philosophy:" my parents were not very OK with me marrying my wife and yet that was the best choice I could have made". Now, regarding my med school plans at an advanced age, guess what: " I haven’t told them and won’t"


I have learned to deal with my own stuff. My wife’s support and the love of my kids is all that I need.


Of course there is a set of circumstances that allow me to keep things in the shadow. For one thing they are overseas so, it helps (they sure don’t help with my kids though!)


So I plan to keep on the down low till I graduate. This way, I will simply either say, hey I am a physician now, or I will never say anything (and won’t be hearing another “you have failed - again -”).

Truly inspirational stories all around. Hopefully I can follow the steps of my predecessors…