I will be starting my postbacc pre-med classes this fall. I saw my advisor today for the first time. While very kind, he wasn’t very encouraging. In fact, he was quite discouraging, especially when he found out I had two kids under 4. He kept asking me, “Are you SURE you want to do this?” over and over again. I’ve been sure I want to do this for 4 years, though of course with doubts like everyone has, but I’ve never been as discouraged as I was when I left his office. The most encouraging thing he said was that I would know at the end of the semester if I could do it or not. At least he was nice about it.
I am sure many people in this board experienced similar situations like you did. Some people do not understand the fact that not everyone may follow the same path as the others.
The most important point is whether you want to pursue this goal or not. There will always be people who do not think the way you do and some of those may express their thoughts in an inconsiderate fashion. Many people change their careers and some of them go to school to do so. It is good to know what you want to do in your life and pursue your goals regardless of what some other people may think or say.
My adviser was the same way at first. It was a bit discouraging since I already had so many doubts myself. But I knew what I wanted and I powered through regardless. By the end of my 4 years there, she was my biggest supporter and ally. So ignore your adviser’s comments, stick to your guns, and prove him/her wrong.
I’m not shy about my disdain for the advice/counseling that school counselor’s provide. My wife and I went to one in Miami 13 years ago and she was awful. Racist, sexist, ageist…not sure but she was repulsive…so much so that she turned us off to the whole dream. The one area of my life where I’ve been a complete retard in that I’ve listened to others, has been in academics. So don’t be like me and move forward. The problem with his statement is that it is not a matter of ability but of desire. Those who quit after taking any prereq class didn’t have the desire to become physicians because none of the prereqs matter a hill of beans once you’re a practicing physician, they are a means to an end…so get to the end.
So…you wanna be a physician? Then do what you have to do to become one and don’t stop until you achieve your goal. Do NOT listen to anyone who is not encouraging you forward, not even yourself. If you’ve made the decision, then ride it till the wheels fall off and do NOT take your hand off the plow…till that land till the crops come.
You can do this, we can all do it, if we want it bad enough. So just get after it!
Advisors do not always know what they are talking about. According to mine, I didn’t stand a chance (despite my academics - 4.0 and a previous career in biomedical research) because I had 2 kids (under 4 as well and was older (she didn’t say it, but she thought it so loud that I hear it).
So do not trouble yourself with meaningless advice, disregard the unwise and proceed toward your goal.
Thanks, all. I know I want to do this. I’m always scared about how it will affect my children and this guy did NOT help. I guess I feel like he’s an advisor so he should know what he’s talking about, but I’ve read croooz’s stuff about his experiences with advisors, so I guess I should take what this guy says with a grain of salt.
You’ve all made me feel much better! Thanks again!
Ignore it if thats what you want to do. Regarding that you’ll know at the end of the semester, ignore that too. The first semester is your adjusting to the sciences semester. It’s expected to not have straight A’s the first semester in my opinion, especially if it’s been a long time since you’ve been a full-time student.
I know of doctors that had 4 kids during med school, and I know a med student that is in his second year and just had his second kid. You just have to schedule time with the kids. If you can handle that, you’ll be fine.
A phrase that was coined by an ex- vice president in the 1970’s - “Disregard the nattering nabob of naysayers!!”
there’s a saying that “those who can’t do - teach.”
Anyone can give advice, whether it means anything is another story. I’ve noticed that very few of the premed advisers posted about here have an MD themselves; they wouldn’t be wasting time with undergrad freshmen if they did. Kinda says something.
Listen to the beginning of my talk from this years OldPreMeds conference - www.youtube.com/watch?v=J7XbnKXvV5Q - I talk about my advisor telling me not to apply because I was a white male!
If you want to be a physician, you will overcome whatever you need to!