When do you know it's time to stop chasing pipedreams?

Krisss, please don’t think you scared me too much. Honestly, my finances scare me more lol. But that’s a stress for another post. I am really happy you have come to a decision you can be at peace with. We are all on a journey, and you are right the paths we take will all be different. Truely best of luck in all you pursue. Please don’t stay a stranger. Your input has been a wealth of information to many.

Kriss, don’t sell yourself short: a “pipedream” is something that is nearly impossible to achieve, and although you probably have a good shot, you weighed the costs and benefits of a medical career at your age, and made a rational decision based on these values. That’s entirely valid, and it doesn’t diminish in the least all the effort you’ve put in so far and all the contributions you’ve made to OPM (for which I’m grateful!).


Many of us here have the same internal struggle. I’ve never wanted to do anything except practice medicine, and since I’ve spent the past 10 years working hard and making sacrifices just to get to the application point, I don’t even have another career to fall back on. The field has changed drastically since I fell in love with medicine as a kid, and with all the debt I (will) have, I’ll probably be eating crumbs and living in a studio apartment the rest of my life. I often feel like I’m “chasing rainbows”, but whenever I reflect on my priorities, I still conclude that medicine is the path for me. Everyone’s priorities differ and change over time, and I personally don’t think there’s anything wrong with following whichever path gives you the most happiness now.


Personally, I’m glad you’re looking into SW - my mom turned down law school to get her MSW at 44 instead, and she had 20 happy, fulfilling years in her chosen profession. I know you will too - best of luck, and don’t be a stranger!

  • jlr18 Said:
Kriss, don't sell yourself short: a "pipedream" is something that is nearly impossible to achieve, and although you probably have a good shot, you weighed the costs and benefits of a medical career at your age, and made a rational decision based on these values. That's entirely valid, and it doesn't diminish in the least all the effort you've put in so far and all the contributions you've made to OPM (for which I'm grateful!).

Many of us here have the same internal struggle. I've never wanted to do anything except practice medicine, and since I've spent the past 10 years working hard and making sacrifices just to get to the application point, I don't even have another career to fall back on. The field has changed drastically since I fell in love with medicine as a kid, and with all the debt I (will) have, I'll probably be eating crumbs and living in a studio apartment the rest of my life. I often feel like I'm "chasing rainbows", but whenever I reflect on my priorities, I still conclude that medicine is the path for me. Everyone's priorities differ and change over time, and I personally don't think there's anything wrong with following whichever path gives you the most happiness now.

Personally, I'm glad you're looking into SW - my mom turned down law school to get her MSW at 44 instead, and she had 20 happy, fulfilling years in her chosen profession. I know you will too - best of luck, and don't be a stranger!



Thanks, jlr, it's nice to hear. I wanted to be a doctor, but off and on, not as consistently as you and many others. Age is really a very mior reason for my decision. If I felt as passionate as many of you, it wouldn't matter how old I was...if I wanted it, I'd pursue it with every last breath. Do I feel I have the intelligence to make it happen? Yes. Do I feel the heart to make it happen? That is where I've the problem. Care about people, but was it what I want to do for the rest of my life.

One area of SW that really appeals to me is working with foster kids that are aging out of the system. At one time, I even thought of adopting an older child because it doesn't matter how old of a child you are, you need someone that care about you and what you do (actually that can really be said for adults too). As a social worker, I can actually specialize in child welfare, specifically working with these young adults who are all of a sudden finding no to help guide them into adult life. Many of us had less than desirable young adulthoods and we didn't start out with the struggles that these kids do.

So that is where my head is at. Thanks for the kind wishes!


Krisss,


I have to admit I find it ironic to be posting this on the thread of the person who got me to stop lurking in the first place. I will actually be joining you in the decision to pursue another path. I have been working on getting my life ready to go to med school for awhile now but I only started posting here when you called out us lurkers:)


My wife recently took a two week “working vacation” with my son. After this two weeks it became apparent that in pursuit of my dream I might lose something even more important. My wife is great and has been supportive during this whole thing but I have always been the primary caretaker for our son and she has always been the breadwinner. We are both very good at our respective roles and not very good at the other. I began to realize that having her assume the role of primary caretaker and breadwinner would be more than she can take (even if she won’t admit it). I have a wonderful family and a wonderful life. I just can’t justify my wife and child’s unhappiness (and therefore my unhappiness) in chasing this dream. To all of you that make it happen and realize the dream I stand in awe of you. I know that choices and sacrifices are not easy to make. I think the world of medicine is a better place for having such an incredible group of people as practitioners.


So instead medical school, my wife and I reached a compromise position and I will be going “mid-level” instead. During all of my paramedic training I was able to work a lot with the CRNA’s in the OR. I completely love the work and it builds on a skill set I already have. So I have started the paramedic to RN bridge and will put in my time to hopefully be admitted to CRNA school. The great thing about this path is I get to continue in a career I enjoy and be at home to be the father and husband that I want to be (with the exception of 28 months for CRNA school).


Thanks again Krisss for getting me to start posting. Good luck on all your future pursuits. While I am sure that like me you might have that “would-a, could-a,” voice in the back of your head I hope that you find the contentment that I have found in my decision.

  • jjcnbg Said:
Krisss,

I have to admit I find it ironic to be posting this on the thread of the person who got me to stop lurking in the first place. I will actually be joining you in the decision to pursue another path. I have been working on getting my life ready to go to med school for awhile now but I only started posting here when you called out us lurkers:)

My wife recently took a two week "working vacation" with my son. After this two weeks it became apparent that in pursuit of my dream I might lose something even more important. My wife is great and has been supportive during this whole thing but I have always been the primary caretaker for our son and she has always been the breadwinner. We are both very good at our respective roles and not very good at the other. I began to realize that having her assume the role of primary caretaker and breadwinner would be more than she can take (even if she won't admit it). I have a wonderful family and a wonderful life. I just can't justify my wife and child's unhappiness (and therefore my unhappiness) in chasing this dream. To all of you that make it happen and realize the dream I stand in awe of you. I know that choices and sacrifices are not easy to make. I think the world of medicine is a better place for having such an incredible group of people as practitioners.

So instead medical school, my wife and I reached a compromise position and I will be going "mid-level" instead. During all of my paramedic training I was able to work a lot with the CRNA's in the OR. I completely love the work and it builds on a skill set I already have. So I have started the paramedic to RN bridge and will put in my time to hopefully be admitted to CRNA school. The great thing about this path is I get to continue in a career I enjoy and be at home to be the father and husband that I want to be (with the exception of 28 months for CRNA school).

Thanks again Krisss for getting me to start posting. Good luck on all your future pursuits. While I am sure that like me you might have that "would-a, could-a," voice in the back of your head I hope that you find the contentment that I have found in my decision.



Hey JJ,

First I think that your plan sounds great...it'll get you to working in an area that you have interest in, but not be forced to compromise on those areas that are important to you...family.

I can understand that many people may want to lurke for a while to get an idea of what the forum is about...plus there are so many different posts to read. But I've found that after awhile, it is important to take action...even if it is just introducing yourself and saying hi. This is definitely a forum in which you'll be warmly welcomed.

So here is a call out...if you are still just lurking, come in and say hi! We don't bite, and just because for personal reasons some of us are taking a slightly different path, we still love to support those nontrads that want to further explore medicine.

CRNA is a good path to follow… it’s probably the best-kept secret in the medical community.



I’ve been noticing similar turns occurring in a good number of my underagraduate classmates as well. While my first reaction both on campus as well as on the boards has often been, “Aw, I really thought he/she had it.” I always come to realize that we each are on a unique path. No question, discernment is a critical element of the process.


Furthermore, the decision to pursue a variation or even a departure from one’s original interest underscores the exploratory nature of education itself. If we couldn’t learn what we truly seek in life, then we would only be gaining empty knowledge and not wisdom along the path.


To you who are moving on from pre-medical studies, I wish you every success and satisfaction. Please keep those of us proceeding toward careers as physicians in your thoughts and prayers. Your encouragement is priceless.

  • ViceroyPlain05 Said:
I've been noticing similar turns occurring in a good number of my underagraduate classmates as well. While my first reaction both on campus as well as on the boards has often been, "Aw, I really thought he/she had it." I always come to realize that we each are on a unique path. No question, discernment is a critical element of the process.

Furthermore, the decision to pursue a variation or even a departure from one's original interest underscores the exploratory nature of education itself. If we couldn't learn what we truly seek in life, then we would only be gaining empty knowledge and not wisdom along the path.

To you who are moving on from pre-medical studies, I wish you every success and satisfaction. Please keep those of us proceeding toward careers as physicians in your thoughts and prayers. Your encouragement is priceless.



First, thank you for your kind wishes, and second, definitely! I love to hear about your goals and wish you all success in whatever you all do.

Hi Krisss,


I haven’t read all the posts above, so forgive me if I’m messing up any details…


My thoughts are as follows. The path to medical school really is a journey… sometimes you are more or less motivated… and your path switches. I gave up on med school about four years ago after a botched MCAT and poor post-bacc grades, and decided to pursue a parallel path of Public Health. This was the right decision for me at the time. Public Health gave me a taste of what I loved about medicine… and made me really want to go to med school even more! Four years later I’m about to start at Tulane at age 30. Sometimes your path changes temporarily and thats ok. You need to stay sufficiently happy and motivated to continue. And if you are delayed a few years, who cares. And if you decide social work is a perfect match for you then great.


I know I’m a little younger than a lot of you, so you might be sitting there saying, “Yeah but you’re 30”. Well, what about the people who are 65 who want to go to med school and are sitting around saying “Yeah but your 42?” Who cares? We’re all going to be 80 someday… might as well be 80 and a doctor than 80 and not a doctor.


Oh, and as a sidenote… I think changing your mind is a huge part of all of this. I don’t know one pre-med or med student who hasn’t at one point or another gave it all up for a while and nursed fantasies of being a writer, and organic farmer, or a photographer. Once I wrote an entire novel a summer after getting a C in gen chem… convinced I was changing my career. You might decide medicine is really not for you… or you might get motivated again. Who knows?