There’s always a reason NOT to go ahead and go back to school; I’ve come to realize most are based on fear. But (isn’t there always a “but”?), I wonder if this latest reason is an ACTUAL reason not to go back to school this semester. Thank God for internet anonymity. Anyway, my father, who lives in the same city, had a nervous breakdown and tried to kill himself this past Friday. He’s currently hospitalized but he’s still hallucinating a little. He’s probably going to be going to the local psychiatric hospital for a few weeks. Which is around the time I would be starting back to school. Part of me feels like I should hold off until next semester so that I can do whatever I can to help, though, admittedly, I have no idea what that is, yet. Another part of me says, “But, Rachel, there’s ALWAYS a reason not to go! And they are mostly valid reasons, too! Will it really help him if you put off school another semester?” I don’t know what to do. I feel helpless, but I’m kind of scared that going back to school right now will seem heartless. And my dad was going to be helping a little bit with childcare - nothing much, just picking up the boys from daycare and keeping them for the thirty minutes or so until my husband or I could pick them up. That seems pretty out of the question for the time being, though I hope not forever. It’s all so new and very stressful. Sorry if I rambled. I appreciate any insights.
You have already done EVERYTHING you can do for someone who is experiencing the symptoms he is experiencing. Intervening to be certain he got the psychiatric care he needed WAS the thing to do. From this point forward, his health, or lack of health will depend on his adherence to consistent care - going to appointments with his therapist and his psychiatrist upon discharge and consistently taking his medication as prescribed. Only you know what his propensity for good adherence is, and whether he will require reminding and cajoling from family members to comply with care. If you are fairly certain and comfortable that he will comply with treatment recommendations, going to school is a fine choice. If you are unsure as to how compliant he will be without the help of family members…and you are actually in the position of primary caregiver, it may be something you will want to put careful thought into. You can PM me at any time, and I can share my experience and expertise with you in this area. Talk closely with his primary therapist at the hospital and see what they anticipate as a discharge plan. Then assess whether it is a plan he will be compliant with. This will let you know if additional family support is necessary to help him sustain recovery. There is also the possibility of a mental health case manager being assigned to assist with medication and appointment compliance if there is issues with him not sticking to the care plan. It is the same with ANY medical condition. The outcomes are commiserate with the patient’s willingness to accept treatment recommendations. I have 18 years in this field, diagnosing and treating. I would be happy to support you in this time.
My stepmother will be his primary caregiver, but my dad has a history of NOT complying with doctor’s orders. He doesn’t like to take medication, so he just doesn’t. Granted, he’s never had to take medication for anything so serious, but still… I feel like it’s going to take all of his family to make sure he recovers from this…
I understand what your going through, my mother has some similar issues… the thing is, if I were the ONLY one that supported her and took her to apts. and took care of her (like I did for a full year), it would be different, but she has a spouse and other children, so while it certainly DOES require ALL the family to support each other and help, it does NOT require only you, so go to school, keep on your track, and dont let anything give you that reason to “hold off”. You will be better support when you are doing what you need to do for yourself anyway, and family will know not to “take advantage” of your time, (not saying yours does, but mine sure did) at least that is my opinion. Since I started school and made clear to everyone that was my priority, they all know I am there for support and if they need me for apts. they schedule it in advance and they respect my time and support me too. Good luck to you