I feel guilty. I want to become a doctor and am trying to figure a lot out right now. One problem I have is this. My fiance’ is on dialysis and I am sort of her care giver. I enjoy taking care of her but would also like to attend medical school at some point. I don’t know how this will affect my taking care of her and our relationship in general. Any ideas?
While there is no easy answer, I can tell you what my husband told me after suffering a pretty bad stroke. I was just about ready to give up working towards medical school because I felt I should be home taking care of him. He told me to keep working towards my goal. Otherwise, in the future when I look back, if I hadn’t accomplished what I really wanted to do, I would be bitter with him and angry at myself.
Now, how does that apply to you? First, sit down with your fiance and have a really open and serious discussion. That should include all aspects of your current situation as well as your future. Does she know of your dreams? Does she support you in them? And, would she be able to accept outside help with her dialysis? Do you have friends, relatives, or family that can help? Also, you need to discuss the financial aspects of any decisions which are made as they will certainly affect your future. Openness and honesty and a true deep commitment to each other should be hallmarks of your discussion.
Best of luck to both you and your fiance.
As someone who has been through this, Linda gave great advice. As someone who is going through school in a relationship as well, I would like to add that you will be balancing your relationships with your education more acutely than ever before. It is very hard at times, but in the end, your loved ones are your support during classes. Best of luck in your future endeavors!
Kathy