I am a 35yr old aspiring to become a medical doctor, but I am afraid of not being able to make the journey. I am seriously thinking of giving up the dream and focusing on something else. To brief you on my background-- As earlier implied, my desire has always been to be a medical doctor, but I had many odds stacked against me. My father died at a young age while I was still in elementary school, and after his death, my family pretty much became dysfunctional; thus consequentially, my formal education really suffred. To sum it up, my mother had me dopped out of high school school because she she would rather have me work. I gave birth to a child, whom she moved with her to another country at 6mths old.
At age 25 I managed to complete my high school studies and wanted to proceed with my goal of becoming a MD. I went to premed advisors at the CC and 4yrUniv in my area, but they advised me to do something else-telling me I was too old to be thinking of attending a medical school. I pretty much believed them because my self confidence had died a long time ago. However, I was still determined to completing 4yr degree even though I could not make medical school. I decided to major in Psychology(for many pers. reasons), and it was while completing some of the program’s courses such as neuropsych and abnormal psych that I realized the desire to be a MD would always linger on my mind, compounded with the fact that my father had died from a disease which could have been prevented and my stepbrother is still in a vegitative state due to episodes of siezures, which could have also been controlled or cured. I decided I was going to proceed with a career in a medical field and chose nursing.
I made it. I was the first to complete a 4yr degree in my family! I completed my degree in Psych. with a MCL and a 3.9 GPA. I completed my science prereqs(4.0 GPA) for an ass. in a 1yr accelerated nursing program and got accepted. I was supposed to start Jan. 07, but I decided to suspend my adm. to fall of 07 because my 6mth old son became seriously sick after I put him in a daycare; we also have not had luck nannies.
The progarm is to resume in the fall, but I have a nagging feeling that nursing is not the direction for me. My husband makes enough to support the family, and he is suggesting that I use the 1yr instead for medical sch prereqs., and proceed with my journey to becoming a MD. My first child is 15yrs old, and she is hoping to also be a MD. My husband thinks we could handle taking care of the kids with me being in medical school, but he is also looking at starting his business in a year or so. I have been reading the posts on this website for quite sometime before deciding to join in, and realized that my situation is somewhat deviated. However, I would appreciate all the advises on the pros and the cons of what road to take.
I am now 36yrs of age and afraid that given the dissapointments I have had in the past and having been told at age 26 that no Med school will look at my application bcos I was not an ideal candidate, do I still embark on this journey? I also want to be the best mother I could possibly be to my children. I don’t know how we could possibly have the time for the children if my husband is thinking of starting a business that soon and I forging towards medical sch.
I am presently a SHM bcos my son’s ped has advised us that my son should not attend a daycare until he’s probbaly two, but I am thinking of tyring a new nanny again. I have a semester before the nursing progm starts in fall, I am thinking of taking some science classes. However, I do not know in what order to take all the science basis(BIO I & II, CHM I & II, PHY I & II, OCHEM I & II and possibly others) needed for Med sch. and how long it will possibly take me to complete them. I ask myself:if my husband and I should seperate in the middle of Med Sch., would I be able to proceed with this dream and still be able to give the best to my children. I also know that I should be feeing more secured but I have heard of women who quit medical schools due to divorce. Should I just opt for nursing as an alternative and just let my beautiful daughter carry on with the touch?
Once again, I want to thank in advance everyone that reads this post and chose to give me his/her 2 cents opinion- who knows it might worth a million 2morrow. Thanks.
WOW! I think there should be a limit to how much heart wrenching info you can post at one time.
I think you need to discuss with your husband about his plans. It sounds like you two would take on too much too soon. Some things to consider;
-What will you do if he starts his businees and you get accepted to a med school not in your area or even state?
-How easy will it be to move after the business starts?
-Is he willing to postpone the business?
-Are you willing to postpone medical school?
-Could you go to medical school and leave the family behind?
There are more but some things to consider. You can do your own postbacc and finish the prereqs in a year. So if you start this summer you could be applying by next year and starting med school in 2009. So that gives you 2 years. Is that enough time for business plans to stabilize? Your daughter would be a year from graduating high school about that time. So perhaps waiting a year and while she’s off to college your off to med school???
I don’t know the answers. If there’s a will there’s a way. The issue you have to consider is there are 2 wills here, yours and your husband. You’ll get quite a few other posts. Take those and come up with a huge list of pertinent questions that need to be answered. The main thing is to make certain about any resentment from either of you two from the decision you make.
Good luck!
I feel for you for the dysfunctional family and low esteem issues you have endured. It takes great courage to overcome such things, more than most people even fathom.
I would caution you about not finishing the program you are enrolled in. Talk to advisors and read up on it, but I would think that not finishing the nursing program would not look favorably on your application. From a medical school’s perspective, what if a year into it, you decided not to continue with your degree? Plus as a nurse, you can make decent money and write your own schedule, as well as get some pretty crazy exp (depending on what field you go into) that add to your medical school application.
and as far as no schools looking at you app because you are not an “ideal candidate”…make sure you examine all of your options. I found allopathy to react that way towards me, but I was interviewed and accepted into many osteopathic programs.
best of luck to you!
- misscompassion Said:
I would caution you about not finishing the program you are enrolled in. Talk to advisors and read up on it, but I would think that not finishing the nursing program would not look favorably on your application. From a medical school's perspective, what if a year into it, you decided not to continue with your degree? Plus as a nurse, you can make decent money and write your own schedule, as well as get some pretty crazy exp (depending on what field you go into) that add to your medical school application.
and as far as no schools looking at you app because you are not an "ideal candidate"...make sure you examine all of your options. I found allopathy to react that way towards me, but I was interviewed and accepted into many osteopathic programs.
best of luck to you!
I don't agree about continuing with the nursing because although she had been accepted, she hadn't started the program. Believe me, there are enough aspiring nursing students on waiting lists as there are aspiring med students on waiting lists. If on the other hand, she had started the program, I would see your point...but she has not.
To the OP, I totally understand where you are coming from and I am 42 now, hoping to get into med school in a few years. I had been accepted into nursing school, but that is not where my heart lies.
It seems as though your husband is supportive of you going on this path...so don't worry about the future...no one has control over that. Since you do have to take all of your prereqs, it'll take a minimum of a year, most likely two...since you'll have to take four semesters of chemistry. Don't rush it...use the time that you are taking for your prereqs to be with your children...
yes, the unknown can be scary...but too many of us spend time worrying about the future and not enjoying the present time (me included)...at this point take a day at a time...don't worry about tomorrow...who knows what wonderful things await!
Krisss17
Thanks to all of you- Crooz, Misscompassion and Krisss17. The few words you all have penned have made a difference in 24hrs. After reading Crooz’s and Miscompassion’s posts, I sat down with my husband to discuss the issues(those suggested by Crooz), and found out that he is not sure if he will be willing to postpone the biz startup nor be open to moving out of state. He is only willing to start the biz in this city, where he also believes I could have my MD education (same state, but the program does not start until spring or fall of 2009). I mentioned the fact that despite the fact that the school will be apt to accepting more residents than non-resident, does not mean I will be accepted. A point to which he disagrees.
Prior to accepting the seat at my local school of nursing, I had also contacted a nursing school in a nearby State that offers an accelerated Masters in the program. They had shown an interest in offering me a seat but as at that time my husband was working on an important project, and we had felt that he should not walk out on it. Now that he pretty much does not have such commitment, I thought of Miscompassion’s advice and thought maybe I could just continue with the nursing career and become a nurse practitioner while I defer the medical till my daughter goes to college and the other one grows a littele older. Obatining the Masters would be a faster route to the Nurse Practitioner than the Associate. I shared this thought with my husband and suggested maybe we move temporarily to the place while I get my Masters and he works on the biz plan(we have the luxury that would afford him to travel on a regular basis.) Well, to my suprise he does not welcome the idea!
There are one private allopathic MD scchool,one private osteopathic, and one soon to be allopathic public allopathic in the city that we presntly live. However, my husband is only bent on moving to this other city(that kinda sucks). So in conclusion, I realized that my husband might be supportive of me being a MD, but I also have to be considerate of his desires, and also think of my family as a unit. I have therefore decided I will go ahead and start on the MD prereqs and take it one day at a time just as you suggested, Krisss17. However, kindly all still advise me on how I should structure taking the prereqs. Once again thanks to you all- for your words have helped brightened my path. More importantly thanks to whomever it was that created this organization.
I apparently misuinderstood that you have not yet began the nursing program. If you have not yet begun, then you do not need to worry about what I mentioned in my previous post. I was accepted into a BSN program, but declined a few months prior due to the realization that I wanted to be a physician instead, and this year I was accepted!
In the end, only you can make the best decision for yourself. I hope that you find the support that you need to be happy in your life. If you would be happy doing something else, such as you mentioned,
- Quote:
If you can be happy that way, well that is up to you. If you are not happy, your child will pick up on that. As for divorce, my personal opinion is that if a marriage is strong and people are supportive and commited (IE worth marrying) then you will get through those couple of years. If not, I say "sayonara". It is your choice, so don't let my attitude sway you, just giving you my $.02
Hello DreamChazr If I understand, You already have a 4 year degree? I currently have my BSN degree but had always wanted to go to med school. I was afraid of going all does yrs b/c I knew I wanted a fam. Now that I have done it and worked some. My passion for Medicine is still there. I thought Nursing would give me the knowledge that I wanted in regards to diagnosing and treating. Nurses do not DIAGNOSE. We do have nursing diagnosis but not medical ones. I know I can do the NP program and still do all of that. Which I still keep in mind. BUt since you haven’t strated the progam and if I understand correcly, you can consider PA (physician Assistant). It is a great program very intense and you would also need the same prereq
for Medical incase you decide to do that. You take these classes at the Medical school very similar. Of course not all the classses but you do similar rotations and get the same taste if that is what you want. Also, you dissect cadavaras (im not sure I spelled that right?) and as a Nurse Pract. You don’t do that. You focuse more on a specialty per say. Not just General rotations like doctors. I hope I don’t sound confusing but if you all ready have your BS or BA then all you need is 2 yrs for the program and of course the prereq