Having a what am I thinking?! moment

Hi all. I’m having a slightly frustrating week and need to vent a little. Sorry to do it here, but it’s the only place where I knew people might actually “get” what I’m feeling.

This is the first week of fall quarter at my school. I think I can honestly say that it’s been the worst first week back I’ve ever had. I feel like I’m hitting road blocks at every turn. First, I’ve been waiting for over a month now for my RA/shadowing paperwork to go through at the county hospital. The paper work that I was told would take a week to go through. Not normally a giant issue, but being 28 weeks pregnant now I’m feeling my clock ticking (not the biological one, the oh-crud-the-baby-will-be- here-before-I-even-get-th e-chance-to-get-my-feet-w et clock).

Then my o-chem prof decided to have a talk with me in an attempt to convince me that I should drop his class and do o-chem next year. After I paid (in blood, sweat and tears plus a ton of tuition) to take gen chem III over the summer in order to complete o-chem this year. And also after I paid a trillion dollars to purchase the books/materials for the class. Not to mention that I’m just plain old stubborn and don’t want to change my schedule. My OB and Peri had already told me I’d be ok for this (I’ve been repeatedly verifying this since before I was even pregnant with this baby). I’m hoping they will feel my pain and give me the permission letter the prof wants rather than denying me out of fear of liablity being pushed onto themselves.

Oh, and the microbiology prof wants a letter too now.

I don’t know. All in all it’s been a rough week. There’s more to it than I’m mentioning (out of compassion for you brave souls reading this). But you know when you’re just having one of those weeks? Guess this is it for me. Sorry to whine about it. I’m sure the hormones don’t help any…lol. I’m just frustrated and second guessing myself right now.

How do you all get through weeks when you feel like you’re hitting your head up against a brick wall?

I hear ya… I’ve been going through a crazy week too! My research paper work JUST came in… it was supposed to take two weeks, but its been a month and a half - i was going nuts.

Professor issues are hard to deal with, I know… but keep your head up and just take it a day at a time. I second guess myself quite often since I’ve been going through whirlwinds of drama but at the end of the day when i’m home, and it’s quiet and relatively stress-free, I remind myself that this is what I really want and bite the bullet. I know thats not the most appealing advice lol but maybe I need a some guidance as well. But hey, there will be rough weeks and there will be great ones, just dont lose sight of the end result!

Good luck

If it makes you feel any better, i have been in school for a month now and have a D in both of my classes. So i am right there in the wtf was i thinking moment… What did i get myself into, how am i ever going to get out of this hole…

I’m sorry Venus. I hope the rest of the session goes better for you.

I have happy news! My OB had no problem throwing together a letter for both the o-chem and microbiology profs. He even joked around with me about it…asked if I’ve been drinking the chemicals and/or rubbing them all over my skin…lol. Anyway, having his letter in hand sure helps restore my confidence. Hopefully both professors accept it and don’t give me anymore flack. Sure would be nice to actually concentrate on the task at hand and not worry about the little speed bumps that can get in the way!

Is this your first child?

Those last 12 weeks get worse, not better. I can remember with my first son how hard it was to take classes and concentrate when 1) I felt tired 2) I was tired 3) I had feet digging and pouncing around in my stomach 4) I was tired 5) my feet swelled so I looked like I had elephantiasis 6) I was exhausted. Then he was born.

Then there are those women who conquer Mt Everest while having triplets and hauling the Sherpa required needs up to the summit… I’m not one of them

Vent all you want. :slight_smile: You can do this. Of course you can. And after the baby comes, even though you’ll be exhausted, you’ll spend so much time just sitting and cuddling…what a perfect time to learn Organic Chem.

Does your prof think you’re not ready academically, or does s/he think you should be just focused on the baby? Have you seen the book Organic Chem as a Second Language? It really helped me.

Good luck. It seems like a hectic time for you.

JKP - This is baby #5 for me, and it’s a high risk pregnancy (history of pre-eclampsia in the last 2 pregnancies, pacemaker patient with a history of asystole, hypothyroidism and advanced maternal age). This is my first time being this pregnant while attending school though. Previously I haven’t attempted taking classes while pregnant. I’ve got a fairly full load this quarter as well…15 units. If my paperwork ever gets finished I’ll also be adding at least one 4 hour shift in the ER as a research assistant, plus a 2 hour meeting with the ED department, every week to that load. I dunno…I’ve been accused of being one of those Mt Everest conquering types before, but the proof will be in the pudding! lol

Moon - Thank you for the kind words! The prof basically is just concerned about protecting the department. He mentioned that we’ll be working with low molecular weight solvents and that they aren’t safe for the baby. The department has a reputation of intimidating pregnant students into dropping chemistry classes. There’s a girl in my class right now that they’ve forced out 3 times already due to pregnancies. One of the profs (the department head) has flat out denied pregnant students the ability to take classes with him…whether or not they have an OB’s note allowing it. On Thursday the lone female professor in the department told me it was them trying to cover their butts…period.

Anyway, I’ve made organic chem my focus for the year. I’m not going to try and be overly ambitious. My plan is just to finish the 3 quarter series on track, and if I’m up to it perhaps add in an upper division bio or math in winter and spring. Mostly though I just want to get organic out of the way with an excellent grade. I’m delaying physics until next fall when the baby will be older. That will also be my MCAT year.

That certainly does sound like a rough week. I’m in a similar boat (though not high-risk). I’m 12wks pregnant, I’m taking four classes this semester, and I’m working nights 24hr/week. Oh, and I have a toddler at home. I’ve been joking with people that I need to find something else to put on my plate, since it’s not full enough.

After the first day that I pulled a 32 hour day (Awake all day, short 2hr nap, work 8hrs and then 4hrs class) I was wondering what I had gotten myself into. Then I realized that med school will be EXACTLY like this, except the classes will be harder and I’ll have more kids. I’m planning on probably having another child during med school, so I might as well get used to the crazy schedule now, when the stakes aren’t quite as high. It really put it into perspective for me.

I’m glad you’re standing up for yourself to your professors.

  • jkp2117 Said:
Those last 12 weeks get worse, not better. I can remember with my first son how hard it was to take classes and concentrate when 1) I felt tired 2) I was tired 3) I had feet digging and pouncing around in my stomach 4) I was tired 5) my feet swelled so I looked like I had elephantiasis 6) I was exhausted. Then he was born.

Agreed! I wasn't able to do anything for the last month! Personally, I try to audit Orgo especially is this is your first time taking it.

I don’t have any advice, just wanted to say good luck!!! I had to drop two classes last spring and was only able to complete one (went on bed rest). I skipped classes this fall and am going back in the spring.

Sounds like you have your hands full.

I work in an organic chem lab, and worked the whole way through two pregnancies!

I am taking ORgo 1 right now too, and I know is gets a ton harder as the semester progresses - but keep up and you will do fine…having a new baby at the end will be a bonus! You can do it!

By the way, I had a “What am I thinking” moment this morning in Anatomy as I did the how old will I be when I finally manage to get out of med school age count…slight panic attack…then I remembered what one poster here on this site said, you will be that age anyway regardless of whether you go to medical school or not!

Okay. It’s going to be impossible to feel sorry for myself for a long time after this thread. Y’all are working so hard!! Good luck this semester!

Okay I felt bad for myself just because my fiance wants to have a baby…and I wanted to put it off…I’m going to stop whining now! I wish all of you preggos the best of luck this semester!