I am still second guessing myself.

I cant believe I am still doing this. I am 30 yrs old why have I not figured it out yet?

So just 20 minutes ago I was searching info on the net about nursing. There is absolutely nothing wrong with nursing, but every time I think “oh maybe I can be a nurse” I just feel very strange and I never have the same adrenaline rush I feel when I think of my future as a doctor.’

I am a mother of two little ones and I try to make sure I do whats best for them. I try and rationalize and say. " I will be done with school sooner, I can spend more time with my family."

But the truth is I don’t want to do that so why am I even thinking of settling.

When I think of pursuing a career as a physician I feel like I am seeing double Rainbows. And I know I do not need affirmation but I just wanted to write it out, and share with others who may be in the same position I am.

I do not want to be 50 wondering why I did not just go for it. I want my children to be proud of me. I want to be proud of myself.

I am just afraid of failing, that is the issue at hand

Hey poet,

You sound just like me. I just turned 31 and am now deciding to go to med school. I have a bs in biology and a masters in education but teaching is not my love. Once upon a time I also looked into nursing and it didn’t give me the same adrenaline. I also just had a baby (2 mos old) to bring my total number of kids to 3 under 5. I am taking the second organic 2 course and studying for the MCAT and I am scared and doubtin but I know I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me and I have an extremely supportive family. My hubby agrees though that doing something you are passionate about makes for a better quality of life. Hope that helps.

Thanks so much for your reply. You know I look at my situation and think oh must be the only one. And then to read that you are actually doing it gives me hope. Thats all I have right now. I tell my parents about my what I am going to do and they always say. just get a job in computers or get a degree in something that can get u a job real soon and then pursue ur dream. I just do not understand there “logic”. Oh well thank God I dont have to listen to them about my decisions anymore. LOL My husband is very supportive,So thank u for taking the time to tell me a little about how u r doing this.

Thanks again.

Hi poet

if you lurk around on this forum, you will see we all have different stories, yet end up with the same dream.

Many here didn’t just dream, they also DID.

If the thought of becoming a doctor gives you butterflies, then just go for it. Of course they is no guarantee of success. Yet, I believe that a failed attempt is way better than an eternal regret.

Best of luck.

My mantra, and subtitle of my blog, (mantra is legally trademarked!) is:

Some people dream. Some people do.

I thought I’d be 45 and applying but life tossed me curve balls, and two years later, I’m looking at possibly stalling one more year and applying at, le’ gasp, 49 for matriculation at 50. Allopathic.

Now, that said - I can’t believe I’m going to be 50. What’s worse, is that I cannot believe it took me 30 years to figure out that NOTHING would quell that tiny voice inside my head that said, “Dr. Ad2b” - nothing.

If you do not try, that voice will still be there; and then you’ll be my age and doing it - and it IS harder at this age because we learn differently than our younger brethren and peers.

Oh, and that “you might fail” voice? I hear it every time I take a quiz, an exam, or write a paper. And then I slay that vitriolic beast with an “A” and never look back.

Go for it! Then you’ll know.

this is normal. I have many times, while waiting for class to start or exam grades would be watching TV and think to myself, “hey, I should just be a medical assistant and be done with it”. But the truth is, I would never be as happy as I am now. (Of course at this moment I could be happier since I am in the middle of studying for step 3).

But in the end, I am very happy with my decision. It sounds like you need a break. We all do. Get away from medicine for a day or two and you will be recharged. Or just come to the conference and you will really be recharged. Heck, if you are near NJ, come to the workshop too. (shameless plugs)

Hi Adoc2be

Well, I didn’t mean to use your “trademark” without proper citation.

I must it is a nice one. It says a lot.


Always better to err on the side of doing something than just doing nothing at all.

Take it one class at a time. One semester at a time. Breathe; Left foot, right foot.

Regret is a nasty, festering little bugger that you certainly don’t want to live with!

Someday, maybe one of us will be one of the researchers who prove the actual existence of a very small voice in our minds and hearts that tell all humans the best, greatest path for our lives.

You know, the voice we hardly ever listen to?

The one that always leads us in the proper direction, but which is usually straight through a briar patch.

If we only listen, and act, on what that voice is telling us, we live more meaningful and richer lives. I try to have faith that ‘every baby brings it own food’, and so far, it hasn’t failed me. Go with your heart, and use your head. Baby steps! Good luck!

Wow! I didn’t realize that there were so many people out there who are feeling as compelled toward the study of medicine as I am. I really appreciate the comments made by Adoc2b. I feel so encouraged!

On another note, I am a mother of five, the oldest is on his own so I have four left at home. I am the sole provider for my family. My husband is currently a student, but will be graduating next year. I was planning on applying this year, but I am looking for some feedback. I really need to beef up my science GPA. And I graduated back in 1995. So, I am going to need to take about 21 credits. I really feel that online classes through UC Berkley is the best way to go, considering my schedule. I work full time, teach part-time at a local university, and have mom responsibilities. Online classes offer the best flexibility, but I’ve heard that med schools frown on them. I’d appreciate any thoughts, perspectives, or experiences you’d like to share.

You pretty much nailed it. Med schools aren’t really big on online classes. If you have schools you’re specifically interested in, call them up and talk to someone in admissions. You would be in a better position to do it when you can devote some full time attention to it in a classroom.

I had to give up a lot to do what I’ve done so far, right down to sometimes living in my car. I’m old, and not ever going to be the best possible candidate due to grade baggage earlier in life, but this is all I want to do with my life so I have to try. It’s been a crazy past few years though.

Thanks for your response Jimi44. Those are good suggestions. I will contact some admission counselors and see if they have become more modern. I’ll post my findings.