I’m so glad to know there is a forum for older med students. My name is veda. I’m 37 and I’ll be starting pre-med this fall. I’m really anxious to go out on a limb and go after this dream I have. I really want to be a surgeon and I think I’ll make a pretty darn good one. I’ve got a long road ahead,though. I never did anything about this dream sooner because the older I became,the more I thought that it was unachievable. But thanks to researching and positive places like this,I found out it’s never too late !! Good luck to all of you for following your dreams!!
Welcome Veda! I’m glad you found us, OPM is such a great place to come for support in this journey. Best of luck!
Welcome to the board! I’m also new here and beginning my pre-reqs next quarter. I’m 34 and leaning toward going into emergency medicine. Where do you go to school? Are you doing a formal post-bacc program?
Thanks for the welcomes! I’m doing my premed/History major at IUPUI in Indpls. Where will you be going to school? My heart is telling me that surgery is my “home”,but that may change once I get to med school (can’t afford to be negative ).
Welcome to the jungle!
Welcome to this very wonderful place. It is a very large part of why I have been able to take on this challenge. Everyone here is stuck in my head when the doubts pour in.
It is priceless!
Hi,Damon and Michelle!
Thanks for the welcomes. I’m so thankful for this site. I’m getting a lot of needed encouragement. I’m so green when it comes to learning all the medical lingo (learning about residencies,research…etc),but I’ll learn. I’m trying to figure out what extra courses I should take outside of my med prerequisites and History major. Doesn’t leave much room for them,but I want to make sure that I make smart choices.
Veda, welcome. Back when OPM was a much smaller community, we had a member who lived in Indiana who I think got into IU at the age of 50. Her story was very neat - she and her daughter were both applying to med school at the same time! Unfortunately we lost touch so I don’t know where she ended up for sure. She’s in either her second or third year of med school somewhere, though.
Welcome to OPM,
I don’t think you’ll find a warmer, smarter, and better group to hang out with! We’re pretty casual, so relax and feel free to ask anything you like. Hope to see you at the convention in Denver this June!
Welcome aboard. It’s a great, friendly bunch here, and they always pull me up when I’m down. Even if I don’t tell them.
Thanks for all the welcomes ! I have a dilemma that I hope someone can help me with…I’ve been pondering with it for a few days. I can’t decide if I should stay at home or live on campus.My home is not the best environment for me when it comes to getting encouragement and positiveness. My family is not one to say positive things. My mom hasn’t said one good thing about my wanting to go to med school…it’s discouraging no matter how excited I am about going to school.I didn’t always live at home.Circumstances led me back home after being on my own for about 6 years. My moving back home was good in the long run because I was able to help my mom take care of my father. Sadly,I lost my father almost 2 years ago (this experience helped ignite my desire for med school) Now,it’s just me and mom and I don’t know if I can handle dealing with my studies and my mother. School is hard enough on its own,and I don’t need anything ruining my chances for med school. I talked to financial aid about my problem. I was worried that I may not qualify for housing if I decided not to live at home. Financial aid said that they take everything into account when they decide on the awards. This is good,but I’m thinking that if I move out,I may have to sacrifice some of the funds that will be going to housing instead of school. I understand that financial aid isn’t going to take care of everything. I’m at a cross road. My mom thinks that I’m planning on staying with her at home forever…she’s not used to staying at home by herself.
I can relate. I must admit the reponses to me going to medical school were a mixed bag. Thankfully, the support there from the one person who counts the most. Everything ele is trivial. If you want to do this, and you feel you can do it, then don’t let negative people stand in your way.
Recently I was talking to this ER doc, and I was explaining my situation to him, and how I was older, and my obstacles. And he said this to me. “If you don’t go to medical school, where will you be in 12 years?” I replied that I’d probably still be working in my current career, and I wouldn’t be a doctor. “exactly” was his respose.
You need to be focused for medical school. External distractions and detractors won’t be beneficial to your mental well being, and you may loose focus. Now, I realize this is a personal choice, so I can only give you my advice, so take it for what it is. You have to weigh the pros and cons, but the fact that you’re asking this question means to me that you’ve already got your answer.
First of all, if medicine is your dream, than you need to not listen to anyone who tries to talk you out of it. After all, it is your life to live as you please. Second, if it makes good financial sense, live at home as long as you make it clear to your mother what your strategy is for reaching your goal. Most folks can relate to a well planned strategy for goal attainment so sit down and make one. Point out the steps that you have taken and where you plan to go from here.
You are going to be responsible for casting yourself in the best light to the admissions committees of the medical school that you seek to attend. Listen to no negative opinions on what you do with your life. You are not asking for anyone’s permission to attain your happiness.
If studying at home is a problem then study at the local or school library. Make your study time your sacred time to think about your goals and get the job done. People who are successful in getting what they want usually have a set plan for attaining many small goals. They check off each one as they are achieved and as time passes, you will find yourself sitting in class in medical school.
My mother would give me the “you are going in be in school forever” speech when I would talk about individual projects or classes. No one was prouder of me walking across that stage for my MD than my Mom. You can’t afford to listen to negativity and take it to heart. Let the comments roll off and replace them with positive thoughts. Find a study place away from home. I personally recommend Starbucks with their comfy chairs and roaring fireplaces.
Remember that this is your life and you don’t need anyone’s permission to live it.
Natalie is so wise! She couldn’t have said it better. If medicine is your dream, don’t let anyone else get in the way of your success. Set your goal and stay on track (as much as possible…we all tend to wander off track here and there).
Hi Veda, my name is Vita!!!
Dito what everyone else said. Stay at home wtih Mom and the library or Starbucks will just be a home away from home.
Sometimes parents or friends/spouses will be negative toward a new goal like going back to school (no matter what the profession) because they may be afraid of loosing you or that you’ll change somehow and they may feel insecure.
When I told my husband at the age of 44 that I’d like to go back to school to have a shot of realizing my dream of becoming a physician, he shook his head and proceeded to put his head in his hands and said “Why are doing this to me?”. He looked so forlorn and he wasn’t happy. (And this was before I found OPM!). I signed up for my first math class to get back in the swing of things, as time progressed and he saw my excellent grades and how happy I was, he really started coming around. Now he’s my biggest supporter.
Maybe your Mom has these feelings?
Also if you moved out, coming up with rent and utilities every month is just more stress you don’t need. School will be stressful enough, but a joyful stress because you have a shot of realizing your dream.
It looks as if you have some time to figure this out while you’re working on your prereqs. Claim your Starbucks study space, work things out with your mom, and see how it goes. If you find that it’s just not going to work for you, maybe you can take your time finding a roommate. Roommates have their own problems, but if you’re not in a hurry you may be able to find someone you’re compatible with.
You can save a little money on rent and utilities, but still not be home. It all depends on how things with your mom shake down as you progress and she sees how well you’re doing. You have lots of choices about where to live, but it may help to realize that you have time to make them.
And it may help to take your mom’s worries in stride if you realize that you can choose whether to live with her or not. You can weigh the pros and cons, certainly, and there are consequences to moving out, but you have the freedom to choose. I find often that a difficult situation is easier to tolerate if I genuinely allow myself to consider getting out of it. Then I see what I’m doing as a choice of mine, not something I have to do.
I just wanted to thank all of those who took the time to help me out with my problem.I appreciate it a lot. I really don’t know what I’ll do…I guess I just have to figure it out.