Lost my drive

I’m not looking for a pity party, but I’m at a place where I’m a bit lost in my course and need honest feedback. After graduating college in 2003, I was completely set on going the post bac path, but for silly 21 year old reasons, I postponed my coursework because I did not want to sit in a classroom over the summer. So I got a job and working in finance for the past few years, always entretining the emdicine idea. A year ago I moved to New York City and got involved in a relationship that has been, well, utterly turbulent. In the midst, I lost sight of myself, overwhelmed by the guy I was involved with and his very opiniated, dominate family.

This fall, I made a big move and decided to give my post bac courses a shot. So I left my job and enrolled full time, taking orgo, molecular bio, and physics. I thought I would take these courses and fall passionately in love with medicine again, realizing that science was my niche. But I find myself drifting and impatient in class, and where I was a 3.6 math major at a top 5 university in undergrad, with drive and attention to detail, now I find myself rather unmotivated.

I’ve begun to start looking into other career paths, like healthcare law, where I can still be involved in the industry.

Do I sound like I’m giving up too soon? Are my feelings of apathy toward the general sciences normal? And how can I go about really seeing what medicine is about, besides sitting in a biology lab all day?

You have begun a marathon, a very long and sometimes drawn out process. It is natural that after not being in school for sometime to be impatient and realize that you had it good without tests and homework.

If you really want to make sure that medicine is for shadow a doctor for a day. See what it is like. Then you can make a bettern decision. You do not have to be a science major to get into medical school, just complete your pre-reqs.



it sounds like you’ve got a lot going on in your life right now. Give yourself permission to enjoy life a little and do some exploring–you don’t need to rush into medicine right now if you don’t want to. You’re still young. And as Gabe suggests, you may want to do some more shadowing and volunteering in a medical environment and see whether it floats your boat.

I think most of us probably experience some angst and “what am I doing here” kinds of feelings from time to time. It’s normal and just indicates that you have an active brain that is trying on some alternatives to your present lifestyle. Anyway I’m sure you’ll end up in something interesting be it medicine or law or wherever your ambitions take you. Good luck!

stay strong!!!

  • ttraub Said:
I think most of us probably experience some angst and "what am I doing here" kinds of feelings from time to time. It's normal and just indicates that you have an active brain that is trying on some alternatives to your present lifestyle.

Hah, I like that, Terry

Minidee - I'd say give yourself appropriate time and perspective to consider it all. As Terry said - it's good that you're asking yourself "do I really want to do this?" Now the challenge is to answer! Find out what you're enthused about and what you're not; figure out if it's just this particular coursework that's not doing it for you, or if it's science in general; and definitely see what kind of direct healthcare you can experience (shadowing, etc) to see if it's really right for you.

having set backs when I was younger and “settling” for Nursing, I found that years later I wanted to be a Doc, it just ate me up inside so I talked to my wife and kids and years later here I am a MS II. Do the same thing, think long and hard and see if you would regret no pursuing this. If the answer is yes then continue, if the answer is no, you are still young and may find the answer was always yes. I’m sure you can “find your way”. One thing I have learned about medschool, it is you gotta want this real bad.

Thanks for your advice guys. This is definitely a process for me, and I’m trying very hard to keep in touch with my true motivations and act accordingly. I’ll keep you updated :slight_smile:

Make up your mind to act decidedly and take the consequences. No good is ever done in this world by hesitation. – Thomas H. Huxley

We should be taught not to wait for inspiration to start a thing. Action always generates inspiration. Inspiration seldom generates action. – Frank Tibolt

If I had my life to live over… I’d dare to make more mistakes next time. – Nadine Stair

Your time is limited, so don’t waste it living someone else’s life. Don’t be trapped by dogma – which is living with the results of other people’s thinking. Don’t let the noise of other’s opinions drown out your own inner voice. And most important, have the courage to follow your heart and intuition. They somehow already know what you truly want to become. Everything else is secondary. – Steve Jobs

“Of all the liars in the world, sometimes the worst are your own fears.” Rudyard Kipling

Never quit. It is the easiest cop-out in the world. Set a goal and don’t quit until you attain it. When you do attain it, set another goal, and don’t quit until you reach it. Never quit. – Bear Bryant