Hi everyone,
If you could see me typing now you’d witness giddy excitement, although lucky for me you are also missing out on a view of my not-quite-tidy room. I have been visiting this site on and off for several months and recently been rather addicted; it feels like home. Thank you to all of you for being so candid and so accepting, this is absolutely what I need right now.
I would have been a traditional Pre-Med student, having decided early on to take a full IB course load and fallen in love with medicine by tenth grade. I grew up with a physically and emotionally abusive mother and was finally learning to believe in myself because of my step father. During my senior year in high school I caught my then teen brother, Brian, molesting our seven-year-old sister and my world spiraled into a nightmare as I found out he was also molesting our sisters and male two-year-old cousin–anyone he had access to. The day I told my mother I was going to report him to the police she came out with a story that my step-father had coerced me into saying this and suddenly people I had never met were part of a court case against my step-father, submitting affidavits of wild accusations. We lost custody of my little sister and she’s growing up with Brian. My life stopped.
It has been seven years and I still struggle with doubt–the doubt everyone has for me. I know I can thrive in an intense, intellectually challenging environment. But just like I know the truth about Brian that certainty keeps dissolving when I get that “it’s too late for you” attitude. I now have the support of a loving partner and have children that I love. I think as non-traditional Pre-Med students most of us struggle more with that doubt others cast on us and fall back into the negatives in our lives. A huge part of this journey is the uncertainty and that’s what really makes our perseverance so special. We know there is no guarantee of that long white coat just by committing to the course work.
I am in awe of everyone here for working towards that ultimate goal. Your stories remind me of how sure I am deep inside and of how little anyone’s doubt matters. I am so thrilled to know this community exists and I plan on filling my mind with all the amazing stories here to leave behind the trivial doubters.
Xo Heme