I am closer to the "bottom line", "just the facts please" end of the spectrum and approached the group just looking for some facts. If the way I did so upset folks (and it seems to have), I apologize.
Bill: I can "get" this. Despite my earlier fairly emotional comments (written on a grumpy mid-week evening), I tend to be a 'just the facts' kind of person too. Unfortunately I don't think you'll find those facts out there. You *may* be able to get an individual AdCom member at an individual school to tell you how many people over 40 they've admitted in the past five years, say - or they may decline to do so. But our group is way too small to be able to provide you with any statistics, much less comfort from those statistics.
At the moment, I am certainly far from passionate about becoming a doctor.
And I think this is more my concern -- because this job sucks if you are not passionate about it. If I've been keeping the players straight, the participants in this discussion have been one attending (me), two residents, and several pre-meds. I am glad I did it but I gotta tell ya, some days it's a close call. I am feeling every one of my 53 years when I go home, and often feeling rather bitter about how very hard I work, for relatively low compensation and little time off. Fortunately I have enough wonderful encounters with people to make me feel really good about what I do. With respect to my pre-med colleagues, until you emerge from the other side, you have
no idea how your enthusiasm and idealism will be challenged. (in other words, guys, be a little easier on Bill, and more respectful, please?)
I'm just exploring -- as quickly as I can. It is in many ways an obviously really good choice and I commend all of you for having the guts to take the plunge. I've thought about it a lot and can't think of any other profession with the same combination of intellectual challenge, benefits for other people, and predictability/stability.
Well put. This was one of the things that attracted me to medicine. It does a better job of challenging me to use more of my brain.
But in my circumstances, a career change at this point is ludicrous in so many ways....[portion omitted] A pattern is emerging: professional student, masochist, never satisfied, basketcase. While I don't believe that about myself yet, it's becoming more and more plausible! ... [portion omitted] I admit, I asked about top ranked schools partly to see if I could easily visualize a path to med school in which the "What in the hell are you thinking?" factor is minimized.
OK I gotcha (I think). If you're leaving people with an impression that you're bouncing around from one thing to another, you think it'll make more sense to say, "Who would turn down the chance to go to UCSF?"
... rather than worry that people are thinking, "He left that great job to go to the University of Southern Alabama? Yikes! He must be desperate!"
If that is a teensy bit of your mindset, I'd suggest, though, that people seem to be generally very admiring of anyone who career-changes into medicine in middle age. I think that our contemporaries - other middle-aged people - find the idea of going back to school to be horrifying and intimidating. (and sorry to lump you into the "middle-aged" group when you are only 40!) The idea of school AND things like staying up all night AND making possible life-and-death decisions is beyond horrifying to them. So if you decide that yes, you really do want to pursue medicine as a career, I think you'll be able to explain it regardless of school.
In any case, you were doing some thinking aloud - a way of processing ideas that I am sympathetic to, and a bit of a risk in a public forum, unfortunately.
Since your original question really can't be answered well here - you will be the one to figure out what other questions will help you in your search for what you think you should do next. I wish you all the best.
Mary
